“Obligation”
A short play by Barry Martin. Copyright by the author August 13, 2012.
FEMALE 1
But I did it.
FEMALE
2
Why? You didn't HAVE to!
FEMALE
1
I know. I WANTED to.
FEMALE
2
Eeewewww, why would you WANT to?
FEMALE
1
I don't know. I just did.
FEMALE
2
It just seems so wrong.
FEMALE
1
Maybe.
FEMALE
2
So unnecessary.
FEMALE
1
Lots of people do it.
FEMALE
2
None of MY friends do it.
FEMALE
1
Really?
FEMALE
2
Sorry. I mean - it just seems so wrong.
FEMALE
1
Lots of people do it.
FEMALE
2
I know, but it's – disgusting.
(FEMALE 1 is silent. A beat)
Did he MAKE you do it?
FEMALE
1
No.
FEMALE
2
He MADE you do it, didn't he.
FEMALE
1
No, he didn't, like FORCE me.
FEMALE
2
But he kept bringing it up.
FEMALE
1
Yes, that's true.
FEMALE
2
Bryan does that too.
FEMALE
1
He made it clear that that he'd be happy if I did it.
FEMALE
2
God, Bryan does that too.
FEMALE
1
But he didn't like, force me to do it.
FEMALE
2
No, but once they start bringing it up all the time, and
just suggesting it without saying it.
FEMALE
1
Yeah.
FEMALE
2
Like Bryan showed me this magazine article. He didn't SHOW
it to me, he left the magazine out where he knew I would see it.
FEMALE
1
What did it say?
FEMALE
2
I don't know, I didn't read it! Eeeewwww!
FEMALE
1
Maybe it's not all that terrible.
FEMALE
2
Seriously?
FEMALE
1
Lots of people do it. Regularly.
FEMALE
2
If lots of people jumped off a cliff, would you do that,
too?
FEMALE
1
Oh, yeah, right MOM!
FEMALE
2
It just seems – WRONG! I mean, what's the point?
FEMALE
1
Well, ideally you'd get some sense of satisfaction.
FEMALE
2
I do not see how that's possible.
FEMALE
1
Lots and lots of people do it, have been doing it for a long
time, and get some satisfaction from it.
FEMALE
2
They SAY they do but how do you know they REALLY do?
FEMALE
1
How do you know anything is true? People must get something
from it or they wouldn't do it.
FEMALE
2
That's true if you're talking about men, but women do all
kinds of things they don't want to do.
FEMALE
1
No it's not like that. (Beat)
FEMALE
2
So how did he talk you into it, because I know he's going to
tell Bryan that you're doing it now and that will increase the demand on me, so
I might as well be ready for it.
FEMALE
1
He didn't TALK ME into it. It was something that wasn't
important to me, and he made it clear to me that it was important to him, so I
decided I was being close-minded about it.
FEMALE
2
So you just gave in?
FEMALE
1
It wasn't a matter of principle to me, it was just something
that didn't matter to me.
FEMALE
2
It's just so disgusting.
FEMALE
1
My mom thought I should do it, too.
FEMALE
2
Your MOM?
FEMALE
1
Yes.
FEMALE 2
I’ve always respected your mom!
FEMALE
1
Me too!
I'm sorry. It’s – revolting. I want to vomit.
FEMALE
1
Wow.
FEMALE
2
I feel strongly about it.
.
FEMALE
1
That's obvious.
FEMALE
2
I'm nauseous.
FEMALE
1
And all from just thinking about it.
FEMALE
2
Yes.
FEMALE
1
Never having even done it once.
FEMALE
2
No.
FEMALE
1
Without even trying it, you can judge everyone who's done
it?
FEMALE
2
I don't mean to be like that it's just ---
FEMALE
1
Do YOU like to be judged?
FEMALE
2
What? No, I'm sorry, I-
FEMALE
1
Don't be an asshole.
FEMALE
2
Asshole? I'M an asshole?? Let's talk about assholes here!
FEMALE
1
You're being an asshole!
FEMALE
2
YOU'RE an asshole!
FEMALE
1
Asswipe!
FEMALE
2
Ass monkey!
FEMALE
1
Ass hat!
FEMALE
2
Ass face!
FEMALE
1
Ass – mouth!
FEMALE
2
Ass – monkey!
FEMALE
1
You said that one.
FEMALE
2
Sorry. Ass -poker!
FEMALE
1
Ass – what? Ass POKER?
FEMALE
2
I ran out.
FEMALE
1
Look, this is out of control. I was just trying to make a
point.
FEMALE
2
I'm sorry, it makes me emotional and angry.
FEMALE
1
I know.
FEMALE
2
I'm ANGRY about it!
FEMALE
1
I can see that. (Beat)
FEMALE
2
So, if I decided to do it – IF I decided to do it – how does
it work?
FEMALE
1
Well, you just look at your options and choose someone.
FEMALE
2
Just choose someone, at random.
FEMALE
1
No, you should give it some thought.
FEMALE
2
Ok, so I choose someone. Then what?
FEMALE
1
You just take a pen and do it.
FEMALE
2
A pen?
FEMALE
1
Assuming you want to go absentee, lots of people are doing
it that way now.
FEMALE
2
Absentee.
FEMALE
1
It's more convenient that way.
FEMALE
2
I see.
FEMALE
1
I mean, it's hard enough as it is, you don't have to make it
inconvenient, too.
FEMALE
2
Absentee means…?
FEMALE
1
You just do it by mail.
FEMALE
2
No one can see you doing it that way.
FEMALE
1
Right, total privacy. Or if you want, you can go down there
in person, to your precinct.
FEMALE
2
In public?
FEMALE
1
Yes.
FEMALE
2
No! I could never do it in public.
FEMALE
1
It's really not that bad when you get used to it.
I'll have to take your word for it. (Small beat) Bryan says he's been doing it his whole life.
FEMALE
1
Yeah, lot's of people have.
FEMALE 2
Eeeewwww. So disgusting.
FEMALE 1
It’s a necessary evil.
FEMALE 2
All right, all right, I'll think about it. Don't say
anything that will get back to Bryan, I don't want the “expectations” okay?
FEMALE 1
Okay.
FEMALE 2
Can we change the subject now? I need a Tums.
END OF PLAY
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