Monday, August 13, 2012


“Obligation”

A short play by Barry Martin. Copyright by the author August 13, 2012. 


Characters: Two females of any race/ethnicity and of any age that makes sense, sitting and talking.

                                                            FEMALE 1

But I did it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Why? You didn't HAVE to!

                                                            FEMALE 1

I know. I WANTED to.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Eeewewww, why would you WANT to?

                                                            FEMALE 1

I don't know. I just did.

                                                            FEMALE 2

It just seems so wrong.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Maybe.

                                                            FEMALE 2

So unnecessary.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Lots of people do it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

None of MY friends do it.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Really?

                                                            FEMALE 2

Sorry. I mean - it just seems so wrong.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Lots of people do it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I know, but it's – disgusting.

                                    (FEMALE 1 is silent. A beat)

Did he MAKE you do it?

                                                            FEMALE 1

No.

                                                            FEMALE 2

He MADE you do it, didn't he.

                                                            FEMALE 1

No, he didn't, like FORCE me.

                                                            FEMALE 2

But he kept bringing it up.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Yes, that's true.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Bryan does that too.

                                                            FEMALE 1

He made it clear that that he'd be happy if I did it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

God, Bryan does that too.

                                                            FEMALE 1

But he didn't like, force me to do it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

No, but once they start bringing it up all the time, and just suggesting it without saying it.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Yeah.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Like Bryan showed me this magazine article. He didn't SHOW it to me, he left the magazine out where he knew I would see it.

                                                            FEMALE 1

What did it say?

                                                            FEMALE 2

I don't know, I didn't read it! Eeeewwww!

                                                            FEMALE 1

Maybe it's not all that terrible.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Seriously?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Lots of people do it. Regularly.

                                                            FEMALE 2

If lots of people jumped off a cliff, would you do that, too?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Oh, yeah, right MOM!

                                                            FEMALE 2

It just seems – WRONG! I mean, what's the point?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Well, ideally you'd get some sense of satisfaction.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I do not see how that's possible.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Lots and lots of people do it, have been doing it for a long time, and get some satisfaction from it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

They SAY they do but how do you know they REALLY do?

                                                            FEMALE 1

How do you know anything is true? People must get something from it or they wouldn't do it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

That's true if you're talking about men, but women do all kinds of things they don't want to do.

                                                            FEMALE 1

No it's not like that. (Beat)

                                                            FEMALE 2

So how did he talk you into it, because I know he's going to tell Bryan that you're doing it now and that will increase the demand on me, so I might as well be ready for it.

                                                            FEMALE 1

He didn't TALK ME into it. It was something that wasn't important to me, and he made it clear to me that it was important to him, so I decided I was being close-minded about it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

So you just gave in?

                                                            FEMALE 1

It wasn't a matter of principle to me, it was just something that didn't matter to me.

                                                            FEMALE 2

It's just so disgusting.

                                                            FEMALE 1

My mom thought I should do it, too.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Your MOM?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Yes.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I’ve always respected your mom!
           
                                                            FEMALE 1

Me too!


I'm sorry. It’s – revolting. I want to vomit.  

                                                            FEMALE 1

Wow.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I feel strongly about it.
.
                                                            FEMALE 1

That's obvious.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I'm nauseous.

                                                            FEMALE 1

And all from just thinking about it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Yes.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Never having even done it once.

                                                            FEMALE 2

 No.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Without even trying it, you can judge everyone who's done it?

                                                            FEMALE 2

I don't mean to be like that it's just ---
           
                                                            FEMALE 1

Do YOU like to be judged?

                                                            FEMALE 2

What? No, I'm sorry, I-

                                                            FEMALE 1

Don't be an asshole.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Asshole? I'M an asshole?? Let's talk about assholes here!

                                                            FEMALE 1

You're being an asshole!

                                                            FEMALE 2

YOU'RE an asshole!

                                                            FEMALE 1

Asswipe!

                                                            FEMALE 2

Ass monkey!

                                                            FEMALE 1

Ass hat!
                                                            FEMALE 2


Ass face!
                                                            FEMALE 1


Ass – mouth!
                                                            FEMALE 2


Ass – monkey!
                                                            FEMALE 1

You said that one.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Sorry. Ass -poker!

                                                            FEMALE 1

Ass – what? Ass POKER?

                                                            FEMALE 2

I ran out.
           
                                                            FEMALE 1

Look, this is out of control. I was just trying to make a point.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I'm sorry, it makes me emotional and angry.

                                                            FEMALE 1

I know.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I'm ANGRY about it!

                                                            FEMALE 1

I can see that. (Beat)

                                                            FEMALE 2

So, if I decided to do it – IF I decided to do it – how does it work?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Well, you just look at your options and choose someone.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Just choose someone, at random.

                                                            FEMALE 1

No, you should give it some thought.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Ok, so I choose someone. Then what?

                                                            FEMALE 1

You just take a pen and do it.

                                                            FEMALE 2

A pen?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Assuming you want to go absentee, lots of people are doing it that way now.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Absentee.

                                                            FEMALE 1

It's more convenient that way.

                                                            FEMALE 2

I see.

                                                            FEMALE 1

I mean, it's hard enough as it is, you don't have to make it inconvenient, too.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Absentee means…?

                                                            FEMALE 1

You just do it by mail.

                                                            FEMALE 2

No one can see you doing it that way.

                                                            FEMALE 1

Right, total privacy. Or if you want, you can go down there in person, to your precinct.


                                                            FEMALE 2

In public?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Yes.

                                                            FEMALE 2

No! I could never do it in public.

                                                            FEMALE 1

It's really not that bad when you get used to it.

                                                             FEMALE 2

I'll have to take your word for it. (Small beat) Bryan says he's been doing it his whole life.

                                                            FEMALE 1
Yeah, lot's of people have.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Eeeewwww. So disgusting.

                                                            FEMALE 1

It’s a necessary evil.

                                                            FEMALE 2

All right, all right, I'll think about it. Don't say anything that will get back to Bryan, I don't want the “expectations” okay?

                                                            FEMALE 1

Okay.

                                                            FEMALE 2

Can we change the subject now? I need a Tums. 

END OF PLAY



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